There will be a thousand questions and feelings running through the mind of someone who wants to get a divorce. The experience can turn the mind into a war zone that isn't thinking clearly or objectively.
Ultimately, every person who files for divorces reaches a moment when they decide that divorce is the only answer. Until this happens, what follows are a few questions you can ask yourself to gain clarity.
3 questions to ask before getting a divorce
Answer the following questions truthfully and thoughtfully:
Have you had a real talk with your spouse? If you haven't told your spouse everything that you feel is wrong with your relationship and/or marriage, it may be time to do so. Your marriage could be saved through effective communication. In fact, some spouses are surprised to find how willing their husband or wife is to make substantial changes in order to make the relationship work. If you're reading this and shaking your head, knowing that you've already done everything you can in this area, then it might be time to call it quits.
Are your expectations reasonable? The other side of the coin involves having reasonable expectations. If your expectations are so high that no husband or wife would ever be able to reach them, there are several ways that this could end: (1) You realize that you need to relax your expectations and that your ex-spouse is actually someone you want to stay with; (2) you realize that you might not be cut out for marriage and being divorced is a better option for your happiness; or (3) you get clear about your needs and expectations, get a divorce and search for someone who can realistically fulfill your needs.
Are you prepared to be single? Being single involves paying your own way financially without dividing the expenses between two working spouses. It may also involve taking care of your children by yourself without the help of your spouse. It's vital to think about these realities before getting your divorce – as it will help you prepare a budget and plan for how you will take care of all your responsibilities alone.
When you're certain it's time
For those who are certain divorce is the answer after reading and answering the above questions, the next step is to understand what's involved regarding the legal aspects of getting divorced. For example, spouses will want to understand how long divorce takes, what's required to begin the process and what will likely happen in terms of dividing marital assets, child custody and more.